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The Times says, “The average woman worries about her body every 15 minutes, even more frequently than men think about sex. ” What are we so worried about? In an internet survey of couples, Ruth Nicholas found that women in relationship rated themselves as less attractive than their partners rated them, and they often failed to pick up on the qualities that their partner found attractive in them. Ruth concluded that we women are still our own worst critics.

The man in your life doesn't see the same flaws you do – or if he does, he doesn't really care.

In his eyes, you're a complex creature who makes his life richer – not a collection of imperfections. With that said, then why are four out of every ten British women constantly on a diet? When we look for confirmation of our beauty, we compare ourselves with media images, and nearly always come up lacking.

These images are not real images of beauty – they are indicators of impossible standards to achieve in order for companies to make more profit.

In a word, they form a trap.

It is sad to know that modern ideas on beauty are designed more for profit that anything else. Put up images of perfect, stick thin women and anyone will start to feel insecure. And when this happens women are more likely to start spending – on new clothes, new beauty products [the magic new elixor! ] or on endless diets.

The diet industry alone is estimated to be worth $100 billion [US] alone.

Insecurity breeds despiration and is the perfect catch for the beauty industries net. But does all this worry and expense make you more attractive to men, or more likely to have a fulfilling relationship? Are men just as much victims as women? Well according to a newly identified mental disorder “Centerfold Syndrome” they are. This syndrome is used to describe men who classify the women around them in order of how they look; their sizes and shapes and men who have this prefer looking at picutures of women rather than actually interacting with them.

They fear intimacy. And it is not a harmless disorder, it has been linked to the increase in divorce and spousal abuse and has been identified as the root of a growing boredom in marriage relationships.

It is important to think then that media images of beauty are not only impossible to live up to but they also contribute to the collapse of intimacy between men and women. Simply winning your battle with the diet is not enough, it could just mean that finding the new, slim, you has turned you from the whole woman you were seen as into a two dimensional image.

Your man will equate you with a magazine or TV picture rather than the real person you were to him.

In trying to fall into line with the modern image of beauty you are in fact risking the breakdown of your relationship.

The real key is finding a real relationship. When you fall in love with someone your beauty starts to shine.

If you start a relationship that is not based on a real connection with a person, then it is doomed to fail as it is not a good relationship. So what if you have a great body, slim waist, great boobs? This could be the lethal flaw, as it could end up with you attracting the wrong sort of man, a superficial one, a using one. What do people who love us find attractive in our body? Be open to the answer – it may surprise you! It surprised many of the people in Ruth's survey.

In our quest to express our true beauty – men are our allies, not our enemies. Through our deep bonds and friendships with men, we can learn more about what makes us uniquely beautiful. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder! When someone is connected to you, then they are able to help you to see the true beauty within.
This feature by Michelle WalterMichelle Walter , Origin Psychic's leading expert in emotional issuesemotional issues and relationshipsrelationships .

In it she examineshow men and women look differently at their bodies. Click here to get your own